Liking someone is like coughing—there’s no way to hide it.

Every time she stole a glance, Jiang Ze knew. Predators in the swamp are extremely sensitive to lines of sight. It had already noticed back at the seaside that the little dog’s gaze pecking at it was like a woodpecker.

The enormous creature thought Jiang Xiaoya must have done something bad behind its back. Otherwise, why would the little dog blush the moment it came close; why would she turn and run the second it looked at her suspiciously. When it took the child by the hand to walk along the beach, it found that the little dog’s palm was drenched in sweat.

So why was she so guilty?

Had she done something bad behind its back, or was she secretly dating someone and too afraid to tell her parent?

In the enormous creature’s eyes, there were three parts suspicion and seven parts scrutiny.

After returning home, it started to grow paranoid. News on the television began to push stories—second-year high school girls getting pregnant and having abortions at school. At that moment, the vertical pupils of a traditional parent widened.

It probably couldn’t imagine that words like second year, girl, abortion could be combined like this in the human world.

But when it looked at Jiang Xiaoya’s round little head from behind, it felt this brat shouldn’t be capable of causing such a huge disaster.

But then there were things like smoking, gambling, hanging around internet cafés and other unsavory places. The little dog was very curious—what if she was led away by bad people?

When the little dog was turning pink from having a secret crush, her mother became suspicious and weighed down with worries.

Every time she came home after going out, the enormous creature would pull her over and sniff her to see if she smelled of smoke or alcohol. But the moment it leaned in, Jiang Xiaoya would bolt away in a flash!

When a child is quiet, she must be up to something.

It was very worried that this brat would suddenly spring a “surprise” on it and bring endless trouble to clean up. But after secretly following her a few times, it discovered that Jiang Xiaoya was only going out ice skating with Xiao Chan, and after returning to school she behaved herself, not climbing over walls to go to internet cafés.

The swamp monster finally breathed a sigh of relief.

Then it began to wonder what medicine this brat was selling in her gourd, after all. It had a very bad premonition. This made even its solitary life in the swamp feel constantly on edge. In autumn, there was too much rain, and the number of water ghosts surged sharply. The swamp monster had to spend a lot of time clearing away the water ghosts near its home. Even more troublesome, some of the furniture had grown moldy and needed to be cleaned in time. The enormous creature had to drag them to the river to scrub them clean, and then dry them.

That day, the enormous creature was moving things around the house. It was an ordinary rainy day, and it moved the cabinet.

Discovering Jiang Xiaoya’s secret was not difficult. Ever since she was little, the things she wanted to hide behind her mother’s back were always in the same spot behind that cabinet. From three years old to seventeen, the candies she hid because she was greedy, the private stash of money she secretly saved behind Jiang Ze’s back… yet the little dog had never thought about why the candies she hid never expired, why the chocolate never melted in summer, and why the private money only kept increasing.

The little dog’s toys and building blocks strewn everywhere, novels tossed aside, glass candy wrappers left after finishing sweets. She would lose them and then bawl loudly, and the ferocious predator could only follow behind her, grumbling as it picked up trash. And if that cabinet wasn’t cleaned out from time to time, the child would eat expired snacks and end up with a stomachache.

And now, beneath the cabinet that had been moved aside, lying there were the little dog’s half-folded paper cranes.

I want Jiang Ze to like me, to see me.

Handwriting crawled all over the page, like the little dog’s tail wagging happily. This was very ordinary—Jiang Xiaoya had always been an honest, warm little dog baby since childhood.

But what does “Mom is the wife” mean?

What common sense, what something done casually?

I don’t want to be Jiang Ze’s little baby anymore. I want to hold its hand, kiss it, love it.

Was it the meaning it thought it was?

The huge, ferocious shadow stared at that little notebook and fell into confusion.

The good news was that the brat hadn’t done anything bad, hadn’t turned into a bad baby.

Although the swamp monster didn’t understand human love, it understood what courtship was.

Just like when spring arrives, little birds become noisy and dance courtship dances on tree branches; in the forest, adult wild wolves search for the one and only partner of their lifetime, nestling together beneath the moon, guarding just that one wolf for an entire life.

Its first reaction was that Jiang Xiaoya was itching for trouble, deserved a beating.

The enormous creature felt the part of itself that belonged to a parent had been deeply offended.

It had raised Jiang Xiaoya for seventeen years, striving to be a very good mother. All the love it had was given to its own baby. It learned to weave clothes, knit sweaters, its huge hands clumsily learning every daily task of taking care of a child. Yet now she was saying she didn’t want to be its baby anymore.

Had it done something wrong? Had it made this brat develop such a misunderstanding?

The part of it that belonged to a parent was stabbed hard, like a sharp thorn. Jiang Xiaoya, hasn’t Mom treated you well? The enormous creature was so angry that its fingers trembled. Even when it encountered a water ghost on the road, it had to clamp down three times with its pale fingers before strangling that water ghost to death. Like a heavy, enormous dark cloud, it moved rapidly through the swamp. Bristling with fury, it charged through the heavy rain and arrived at Jiang Xiaoya’s school.

It wanted to question her: what did I do wrong, that made you unwilling to be my child anymore?

Until that familiar figure came running toward it, happily throwing herself into its arms. “Jiang Ze, Jiang Ze, why did you come to see me!”

That angry, wounded emotion stopped abruptly.

Vertical pupils examined her face.

As if trying to see straight into her heart.

So that was it.

So this was the reason she refused to call it Mom.

Perhaps sensing that the enormous creature’s gaze was a little off, she felt uneasy and, a bit nervously, called it Jiang Ze. When she was nervous, her expression looked like a little bird that couldn’t find its nest.

There was a long silence. But in the end, the enormous creature did not choose to erupt. It squatted in front of her for a long while, its aggressive body slowly relaxing, lowering its head and letting out a sigh.

From behind its back, it slowly took out a bag of red apples. “Mm, I came to see you.”

───♡───

On the way home, the enormous creature’s anger was gradually washed away by the rain.

In the heavy rain, it thought slowly:

Its little Ya was still a child. At such a young age, how could she tell the difference between dependence and romantic love? Maybe it was just because it was male, and because they had grown up relying on each other, that some misunderstanding had arisen; just like before she turned three, she always couldn’t tell reality from dreams, always saying that crocodiles bit her butt at night. Why be angry with her?

A little dog’s interests were like summer rainstorms—coming and going in a hurry. Just like when she was in junior high, she liked dyeing her nails, dyeing everyone in the family’s nails once. She even eagerly wanted to dye Ah Hua’s cow hooves. But this year, when the balsam flowers bloomed, she completely lost interest.

The enormous creature shook its head, thinking that it shouldn’t make a fuss or show such an excessive reaction and anger.

Because very likely next month, next year, Jiang Xiaoya wouldn’t want to like it anymore.

The anger gradually subsided, and it chose to pretend that nothing had happened.

After returning, life slowly became flat because of the separation. The notebook beneath that cabinet lay quietly in a corner, as if it had never been opened. Yet it was like a tiny thorn embedded in a fingertip.

Insignificant, but always stabbing without warning.

It did feel a little sad. Because it felt that the part of itself that was a mother had been denied.

But seventeen years had passed—if it were no longer Jiang Xiaoya’s mother, it could hardly find an appropriate word or position to describe itself.

When chopping vegetables, the blade struck the cutting board, making a crisp sound. The swamp monster stared at its own hands and thought: what is there about it that’s worth liking?

Although Jiang Daya took very good care of Jiang Xiaoya, it wasn’t even human, its body temperature much lower than a human’s. What on earth did this brat see in it? If she weren’t its baby, perhaps when she saw it pass by with that harsh, rasping sound, she would let out a frightened scream.

On nights of hunting water ghosts, passing by the display windows of ruins, it couldn’t help stopping, staring carefully at the ferocious face splashed with blood reflected in the glass. It heard human screams behind the glass window. It passed by them indifferently, feeling that Jiang Xiaoya’s sense of aesthetics might be a little off.

The youth had never thought that it possessed any kind of attractive charm. Jiang Xiaoya was always saying it was naggy, fussy, always reminding her to wear long johns in autumn. She said it managed her too much, like the reincarnation of Tang Sanzang. Yet it had started raising Jiang Xiaoya from a very young age—without being this careful and nagging, it wouldn’t have been able to keep her alive.

Because its mind was always on raising a child, the enormous creature had never had moments of romantic indulgence. It didn’t know how to enjoy life or create romance the way the novels Jiang Xiaoya read described. It didn’t understand what human love was.

It only knew how to make her salt-baked roast chicken, creamy stewed mushrooms. To pick out every shrimp she didn’t like to eat.

Still, in the swamp monster’s heart, Jiang Xiaoya was just a little baby.

Just like looking at a child’s mischief, it calmly felt that this was only a small disturbance along the path of growing up. She would soon forget it, just like every small cold she’d had before.

A cold would get better very quickly.

It was just that a cold would always have moments of sneezing and coughing.

The autumn rain came urgently. Jiang Xiaoya, on holiday, hurried back home, her clothes and hair completely soaked along the way.

She complained that the rain had gotten her schoolbag wet, following behind the enormous creature. It pretended that nothing had happened, listening as before to her complaints about heavy schoolwork and complicated interpersonal relationships.

Just like for many years in the past, every single time it was the enormous creature that picked her up and brought her home, preparing clean towels and hot water, pulling the child into its arms to dry her hair. Yet upon getting home, when it instinctively reached out to grab Jiang Xiaoya over, the enormous creature—having repeated this action for seventeen years—paused for a moment.

The big hand stopped in midair.

It suddenly took a serious look at the child it had raised since she was small. In its eyes, Jiang Xiaoya had been crawling all over the floor just yesterday.

But in reality, seventeen-year-old Jiang Xiaoya had big, round eyes; her wet hair curled and clung to her cheeks. Without realizing it, she had already grown into a very captivating girl. Perhaps she could no longer be treated as a little baby.

She was looking at it with a gaze like roses.

Filial attachment is a damp little cub lifting its head in dependence; but liking is the gaze of rose petals soaked with dew. Because she wants to obtain this person, there is a bit of urgency and restlessness—it is a fluffy, warm little dog, desperately yearning for a kiss.

She looked up at it, what lay within on the verge of breaking out, yet trying to cover itself up.

Outside the window, the torrential rain fell heavily.

It sensed that hazy, lingering atmosphere. In the heavy rain, it wrapped around the two of them like water-soaked cotton.

But in its eyes, it had mixed formula for her, watched her learn how to walk, watched her become a healthy, lively child. That was the feeling of raising a rose. It knew all her little bad habits—biting her nails, kicking off the blanket—and had spent most of its life worn down by this troublesome child.

It lowered its head, no longer pulling her into its arms as it used to, no longer skillfully blow-drying the little dog’s fur with a hair dryer. Instead, it draped a big towel over the little dog’s head, patted her head, and said, “Xiaoya, dry your hair and go drink some soup.”

The little dog lowered her head in disappointment, clutching the towel and rubbing her head dry.

The mushroom soup bubbled and burbled. It looked at the heavy rain outside the window, hoping that this downpour would pass quickly, that life would quickly return to how it used to be.

Jiang Ze thought, perhaps it really had done something wrong.

It felt like a primitive who had lived in a cave for a very long time, unaware of the vast changes of the world outside, of the shifts of sun and moon. But it was, after all, a dull, solitary swamp monster. It could squat beneath a big tree and remain unmoving for months.

It always stubbornly believed that its little dog was still a baby. And so it ignored the fact that she was already a young lady on the verge of adulthood. Intimate things like goodnight kisses and hugs could no longer be done; it had to keep some distance from her.

Adults are always unable to keep up with the speed at which children grow. Just like in the eyes of the youthful Jiang Ze, Jiang Xiaoya was still a little baby who needed her mother’s protection. Yet when reaching for pepper in the kitchen, the swamp monster saw, in the corner of the cabinet, the little dog doll that Jiang Xiaoya had loved when she was five years old, now somehow covered in dust.

It took it down with care, only to find that the seams had come undone, the glue had failed.

So it turned out that it was already a toy from twelve years ago.