All of Lu Yixin’s emotions were written on her face.

The light in the kitchen was very good, so Fang Yongnian could clearly see her quickly lower her gaze after he said that sentence.

Her eyes weren’t dark in color; when she lowered them, the shadows caused that light color to dim instantly. But it was only for half a second—she soon raised her head again, and the brief moment of loss vanished without a trace.

“Abusing your wife is fun for a moment, chasing her is a crematorium.” She gnashed her teeth.

Fang Yongnian: “???”

Why did the literal meaning of that sentence sound so confusing?

“You wouldn’t understand.” Lu Yixin waved her hand, looking rather dejected.

That Fang Yongnian would refuse her, she had already known. She just didn’t expect that his refusal would sting so much.

What was the point of it? Wouldn’t it have been fine if he had just said, don’t take the exam?

After all, no matter what he said, she wasn’t planning on listening.

But saying I can’t take responsibility for that—that did hurt a little.

Just like the last time, when he said he would get tired…

So when she left the kitchen, she shot Fang Yongnian a fierce glare.

“What does it have to do with you whether I take the meteorology exam or not!” she snapped, her slippers slapping loudly as she walked away.

She didn’t need him to take responsibility!

Fang Yongnian leaned silently against the cabinet door, still wooden-faced as he mulled over the five-character verse Lu Yixin had just thrown out.

Honestly, he was shocked.

Lu Yixin’s headlong recklessness and fearless determination left him at a loss. It was clearly something so absurd that merely saying it aloud would make one feel embarrassed—but when she did it, it seemed so upright and forthright.

So forthright that he would occasionally be pulled into that world where she liked him; occasionally, he would think that liking someone, no matter what, was a beautiful thing. That Lu Yixin liking him was something that shouldn’t look so pitiful.

He smiled bitterly to himself in the kitchen, then went and closed the window Lu Boyuan had just opened, pulling the curtains shut.

Blocking out the sunlight, letting everything return to its original state.

“Let’s go to the pharmacy,” he said calmly, as if nothing had happened. Only he never again mentioned Lu Yixin’s dream.

୨୧ ⏔⏔⏔⏔♡⏔⏔⏔⏔ ୨୧ 

Looking back now, that day was actually a very ordinary day.

Early in the morning, they had soy milk and fried dough sticks that Lu Boyuan had queued up to buy. When it was just the two of them, Lu Yixin gave Fang Yongnian her usual daily confession.

On the way to the pharmacy, Fang Yongnian used the cat food he always carried to feed a few stray cats that often waited there for people to give them food.

The sunlight was good that day—the long-lost blue sky, the gentle spring breeze, and in the air, the scent of earth and wildflowers.

At that time, Lu Yixin never thought that such an ordinary day would become frozen in her memory of growing up.

When the neighborhood aunties arrived at the pharmacy, it was almost noon. Lu Yixin was biting her pen, struggling with English grammar, while Fang Yongnian had his head lowered, reading a book. He had just had a haircut—no longer any hair covering his face—and he looked quite pleasing to the eye.

The bell at the pharmacy door chimed with a “ding-dong” as someone entered. Lu Yixin looked up, pen still between her teeth.

It was just a few ordinary middle-aged aunties who looked quite familiar with the pharmacy. They were chatting in Hecheng’s local dialect as they examined the new blood pressure monitor that Fang Yongnian had just set up.

“Is this one any good?” Auntie A asked loudly.

“It’s about the same as the one you bought last time.” Fang Yongnian smiled as always, but didn’t try to make a sale. “It’s too expensive. You can just come here every day to measure your blood pressure on time.”

“I told you, the young man at this pharmacy is really honest.” Auntie A said in dialect to the other aunties, sounding proud. “We come here every day to measure our blood pressure for free, and he never tries to sell us any of those random medicines.”

Lu Yixin, being from Hecheng, understood their words. The corners of her lips lifted, she was in a pretty good mood.

“Does he have a girlfriend?” The aunties, relying on the fact that the young man was an outsider, spoke freely in dialect right in front of him. “He’s quite handsome.”

Lu Yixin quietly glanced at Fang Yongnian.

He held his book and stayed as still as a mountain, unmoved and deaf to the world.

She knew he understood the Hecheng dialect, he just never spoke it.

Auntie A looked at Fang Yongnian, then tugged the sleeve of the auntie who had just asked whether he had a girlfriend, and pointed to her own right leg.

The group leaned close together, whispering in hushed tones: “I think there’s something wrong with his leg.”

“What’s wrong with it?”

“I haven’t seen it myself, but the wife of Old San from next door told me she once wanted to introduce a girl to him, and he said he had a prosthetic leg.”

“What’s a prosthetic?”

“It means a fake leg, he’s missing one.”

The whispers instantly grew louder after that.

“Oh heavens, that’s so scary!”

“You really can’t tell at all!”

“I said so, didn’t I? He’s always sitting. You rarely see him standing or walking around.”

“Is that true? I even saw him driving.”

“Must be a disabled person’s car. The wife of Old San’s house wouldn’t make something like that up.”

Lu Yixin gripped her English test paper tightly, saying nothing.

This kind of thing wasn’t new. The residents around these old neighborhoods had known each other for decades. Whenever an outsider moved in, they could dig up eight generations of the person’s ancestors within days—let alone someone like Fang Yongnian, a single outsider who had opened a pharmacy in the community.

Such unrestrained whispering happened almost once every month.

And Fang Yongnian was always like this—pretending not to understand, pretending not to hear. Not even the slightest twitch appeared at the corner of his brow or lips.

In these four years, who knew how many times he had heard such things. So now, he could even calmly tell people, I’m missing a leg. I use a prosthetic.

But Lu Yixin couldn’t.

She could never get used to it. Every time she heard it, she couldn’t help wanting to speak up.

What business is it of yours?

What does it have to do with you?!

“What medicine do you want to buy?” she suddenly spoke up, using dialect.

Fang Yongnian glanced at her, pressed down the sigh rising to his lips, and lowered his head again to continue reading.

Fang Yongnian glanced at her, pressed down the sigh that almost escaped his lips, and lowered his head again to continue reading.

Things that couldn’t be stopped, he never tried to stop them. That was why, after becoming disabled, he rarely went back to his hometown. Because while he could endure it, his family might not be able to.

The few aunties who had been chatting so heatedly were startled by Lu Yixin’s sudden voice. They patted their chests.

“You scared me to death!” Auntie A exclaimed exaggeratedly in standard Mandarin. “We’re not here to buy medicine, we just came to check our blood pressure!”

She hadn’t expected that the young girl sitting there was also from Hecheng. For that brief moment, she felt a kind of embarrassment—like being caught doing something she shouldn’t.

Lu Yixin had successfully interrupted their gossip. She said nothing more and lowered her head again to continue working on her English test paper.

After two years of practice, she knew well that idle gossip couldn’t be taken seriously. If she did, the only person who’d die of anger would be herself.

“Who’s that girl?” Auntie B asked, still unwilling to let go of the previous topic. “His daughter?”

Auntie A, who always had the latest information, tugged on her companion’s sleeve again.

This time, Fang Yongnian wasn’t reading anymore. He looked up, intending to urge them to hurry up if they wanted their blood pressure measured. But just as he closed his book, his gaze caught the faint redness at the tips of Lu Yixin’s ears and he froze.

For some reason, he suddenly recalled that morning in the kitchen, the way Lu Yixin had squatted there looking up at him.

She had said she wanted to study meteorology, so she could tell him every time a thunderstorm was coming.

He remembered her boldness, her uprightness.

He reopened his book, lowered his head again, and fell silent once more.

“Seems like she’s his niece,” Auntie A switched from dialect to standard Mandarin, smiling as she asked Fang Yongnian, “Is that right?”

“No, she’s my senior’s daughter.” Fang Yongnian smiled.

He couldn’t crush her uprightness himself, but the real world could.

“Ah? Not your niece?” Auntie A looked a bit surprised. “I see this girl coming to find you quite often.”

She had even seen the girl going to his house at night.

So she wasn’t his real niece?

Fang Yongnian rubbed the edge of his book. He was used to reading professional texts in the pharmacy; every one of them was a thick tome, most not even in Chinese.

He had been reading this one for quite some time already. The pages had become rough under his fingers.

He didn’t look at Lu Yixin. Instead, he raised his head and looked at the auntie.

“We’re rather close,” he said with a polite smile.

It was the truth, but it made Lu Yixin’s heart tremble violently.

The aunties said no more. The whispering stopped completely. They didn’t continue discussing the blood pressure monitor, nor did they stay to have their blood pressure measured.

They left in a hurry, satisfied with the massive piece of gossip they’d just acquired.

“Follow them and listen,” Fang Yongnian spoke again only after they were gone. His tone was slow, giving no hint of emotion.

Lu Yixin gripped her pen tightly.

“Go listen,” Fang Yongnian looked at her. “Then you’ll be able to see things clearly.”

When he read, Fang Yongnian wore glasses—black-framed ones—that looked like an unbreakable mask upon his face.

Lu Yixin bit her lip.

“Lost your nerve?” Fang Yongnian’s voice carried a faint smile. “Weren’t you quite bold this morning?”

Lu Yixin slammed her pen down with a sharp snap.

“We don’t live in a vacuum.” Fang Yongnian’s brow didn’t even twitch. “What they said, those are the kinds of things most people would say.”

“You don’t even dare to go listen, and that so-called courage of yours—is it only aimed at me?” he provoked her.

She knew he was goading her.

But still, she set her pen down and dashed out of the pharmacy.

Fine, I’ll listen!!

What was she afraid of?

She already knew the reasons why they couldn’t be together. She was never some naive child, she’d been through plenty.

What was there to be afraid of?!

୨୧ ⏔⏔⏔⏔♡⏔⏔⏔⏔ ୨୧ 

Across from the Yimin Pharmacy was a small community activity area. The few aunties who had just left the pharmacy were now gathered by the metal railing, talking animatedly.

They spoke loudly in Hecheng dialect, so even though Lu Yixin had only just crossed the street, she could hear every word with perfect clarity.

“I’m telling you, I really saw it. Around nine at night, that girl went to his house with her schoolbag on, still in her uniform.” Auntie A said excitedly.

“Good heavens, what a sin! That girl’s still in high school, isn’t she? Do her parents not care?”

“I’ve hardly seen her father, but I’ve seen her mother. Looks soft-tempered, probably can’t control her kid,” another auntie clicked her tongue, righteous indignation all over her face.

“To think I always thought that young man was a good person.” Auntie A stomped her foot in anger.

“Who knows if that girl’s even of age yet. What a sin, such a young girl.”

“He’s missing a leg, doesn’t he have any self-awareness? The girl doesn’t understand, but he’s a grown man and he doesn’t either?”

“I think he’s doing it on purpose. Isn’t there a saying that disabled people tend to have… psychological issues?”

“That’s true. Keeping such a young girl by his side, no wonder he can’t find a wife.”

“Well, I won’t be buying medicine from him anymore.” Auntie A spat on the ground.

Hidden behind the trees, Lu Yixin clenched her fists tightly, standing ramrod straight.

—

Author’s Note:

These two chapters are the most heartbreaking ones of Fang Yongnian’s rejection. Little Yixin has to grow.

Just like Liu Miqing said—liking someone and the cost of liking someone are not the same.