Lazily about to close her eyes, Lizhu suddenly opened them wide.
“…What did you rub off? When did it get smudged? Why are you playing tricks on me again!”
Lizhu instantly sobered up.
So when he was speaking all that nonsense earlier tonight, he was actually trying to distract her so he could secretly do this, right?
Pei Zhaoye merely smiled without speaking, turned around, and left.
Xuan Ying was hurrying over with Chang Jun. When they saw him coming out of the princess’s room with a face full of spring breeze, both of their faces instantly turned pale.
“Princess—”
Xuan Ying and Chang Jun sat upright before Lizhu’s couch, solemnly asking:
“Did that madman offend the princess?”
Lizhu furiously tore off her hair ornaments.
“He did! He offended me completely. I’ll never believe him again!”
Just what did he not want her to see?
How hateful.
The more he refused to let her know, the more curious she became!
Xuan Ying and Chang Jun exchanged a glance.
Xuan Ying patted his shoulder and reprimanded in a low voice:
“Didn’t you say that bandit still knew manners, that while in the mountain stronghold he didn’t lay a finger on the princess? What happened now?”
Chang Jun was stunned. “Heaven bear witness, he truly didn’t move before! His interest in the princess wasn’t even as great as his interest in the golden buyao on her head!”
Xuan Ying swore solemnly, “Impossible. How could any man see the princess and feel nothing. If his heart doesn’t stir, at least the lower half of his body would move a little.”
Chang Jun and Lizhu, shoulder to shoulder, both looked toward the shockingly outspoken Xuan Ying.
“…Ahem, Xuan Ying misspoke. The princess has been frightened these few days—rest early, we’ll discuss the rest when you wake.”
The door slowly closed. The inner chamber fell silent, with only an occasional chirp of birds signaling the coming dawn.
Lizhu turned over, curling herself into a ball, drowsily thinking:
This bed is so narrow, the bedboard as hard as stone.
Even with a thick mattress spread, it’s still uncomfortable to sleep on.
Did he use to sleep in a place like this?
…Well, that wasn’t her fault!
She was still angry and would definitely not speak to him tomorrow either!
A faint ray of morning light filtered through the window, illuminating the wall before Lizhu’s eyes.
There seemed to be something written on it.
With heavy eyelids, Lizhu barely managed to make out the childish, clumsy handwriting.
“Fought south of the city, died north of the wall, died in the wild unburied, eaten by crows.”
“The brave riders died in battle, the dull horses wandered and neighed.”
It was a military song…
Lizhu closed her eyes. By her ears seemed to echo the clinking of cups and dishes, the soft flutes and clashing drums.
She suddenly remembered—when she and Pei Zhaoye first met in her previous life, she had also heard this very same tune.
·•—–٠✤٠—–•·
The first time Lizhu saw Pei Zhaoye was at a wedding banquet in the Tan residence.
At that time, Tan Xun’s cousin was getting married. The banquet gathered countless nobles of Luoyang, including Pei Zhaoye, who held the position of Grand Coachman among the Nine Ministers, and Lizhu, who had been married to Tan Xun for a year.
The night banquet was at its height when a drunken Tan Rong staggered to his feet.
“…Everyone has spoken of performances tonight, and spirits are high, yet the court music is still missing. It is said that the princess is gifted in music, why not have the princess play a piece to entertain the guests?”
As soon as these words fell, the hall abruptly fell silent.
Someone said, “The general is drunk. How can he ask the princess to act as an entertainer?”
“Why not? This is the Tan household. The Princess of Qinghe is the Tan family’s matron, why shouldn’t she play? Come, bring the instruments!”
Tan Rong clearly meant to vent his drunken madness, yet none of the Tan family present stopped him.
At that time, the Tan clan had just proposed offering annual tribute to ease the border’s pressure, earning Emperor Mingzhao’s favor. Their power was at its peak. Lizhu dared not oppose them outright and looked around anxiously.
Where was Yuhui?
Where had he gone? Why wasn’t he here?
Thump—thump—
Drumbeats sounded among the seats, drawing everyone’s attention.
Through the sparse bamboo curtains, Lizhu saw a man wearing an jinxian crown, its red tassel tied beneath his chin, setting off his pale, cold face and angular lines.
The man leaned lazily against the armrest by the drum, smiling languidly.
“Just now, I heard you all discuss music so eloquently that my own hands itch. Since the general wishes to hear a tune, why not listen to one from me?”
Tan Rong sneered coldly. “You? The Grand Coachman Pei’s talent is known throughout the court, no need to disgrace yourself here.”
The court officials favoring peace all burst into laughter.
But the man said: “Court music is not my strength. Yet you all hide in Luoyang day after day, how could you ever lack for elegant tunes from the palace? What we have not heard for years are the army songs. Why not play one today, lest it become the last voice of our Nanyong?”
“Well said!”
“Play the military song!”
The officials supporting war echoed their agreement in succession, their voices instantly overpowering the others.
Through the curtain, Lizhu watched as that man flicked his sleeve and rose, striking the drum and singing—
The meaning of the lyrics was:
South of the city and north of the walls, fierce battles rage, corpses lie everywhere, crows gather in flocks.
Fortresses built upon bridges, roads broken, no passage between north and south.
No harvest in the fields, what shall the lord eat? Even those who wish to serve loyally have no strength left.
The song, dyed with drunkenness, was bold and unrestrained, as if no one else existed. The hall fell completely silent.
As he sang, the clear tone of a dongxiao suddenly joined in, harmonizing with the drum.
The man looked deeply toward the curtain.
The dongxiao wept and sighed, and when the song reached its last two lines—
“Thinking of loyal ministers, loyal ministers are truly worth thinking of.”
“In the morning they march to battle, by dusk they never return!”
When the song ended, a soft and gentle voice came from behind the bamboo curtain:
“The melody is easily played, but the heart is hard to find. Grand Coachman Pei’s song—truly, it pleases me.”
The man’s gaze darkened, as if it might pierce through the curtain.
·•—–٠✤٠—–•·
The sun rose high.
With a head full of messy hair, Lizhu sat on the couch, staring in a daze at the words on the wall.
Last night Pei Zhaoye had stopped her again and again from staying here… was it because of this?
Lizhu raised her hand and brushed the markings.
The handwriting was too crude, clearly that of a child.
Aside from the song lyrics, there was also a rough sketch of the borders between Nanyong and Baiyue.
Hugging her knees, she studied the marks closely, almost able to imagine the young boy sitting on the couch, writing stroke by stroke, full of youthful pride and spirit.
Lizhu couldn’t help but curve her lips into a smile.
What was there to hide? It wasn’t anything shameful.
“Princess, you’re awake?”
Hearing movement from inside, Xuan Ying entered with a basin and washing tools.
“Perfect timing, Princess. You should wash up quickly. If you don’t go soon, I fear they’ll start fighting.”
·•—–٠✤٠—–•·
In the small courtyard.
Chang Jun, standing guard with his sword, addressed the two people below the steps:
“The Princess is awake. After washing, she will summon you herself. Please, be patient.”
Danzhu rubbed her chin. “Summon—now that’s a new word. Your princess sure knows how to put on airs. When I go back, I’ll tell our Mountain Lord to learn a thing or two.”
Jie Yun shot her a glance, his eyes sweeping over her tall frame and overly muscular arms.
As a bodyguard serving beside Tan Xun, Jie Yun was long acquainted with Chang Jun. While waiting, the two of them began chatting idly.
Jie Yun said, “Is she really a woman? This is the first time I’ve seen a woman built like an ox.”
“When she ties you to a pillar, or shoots two people through with a single arrow, you’ll know for sure.”
Chang Jun replied expressionlessly.
Danzhu gave a cheeky grin.
The inner room door opened. Jie Yun immediately turned around.
“Jie Yun greets the Princess. Young Master Xun heard that the Princess stayed up all night to investigate the affairs within the Pei residence. He has ordered the kitchen to prepare the dishes the Princess favors, and invites Your Highness to his courtyard to dine together.”
Lizhu had just stepped out when she heard this string of words, her footsteps pausing mid-step.
“…Damn you, why’s your mouth running so fast, you birdman!”
Danzhu’s eyes widened, and she immediately grabbed Lizhu’s arm.
“Our Mountain Lord’s got good food and fine wine ready too! Princess, come with me!”
Danzhu’s grip was so strong that Lizhu was pulled half a step forward at once.
Jie Yun shouted, “Chang Jun! This person dares behave so rudely toward the Princess of Qinghe, how can you stand to see it?”
“What are you yelling for? Get out of the way!”
Chang Jun: “…”
For some reason, Chang Jun suddenly thought of the scene in the imperial gardens, where the concubines of the palace fought for favor among the blossoms.
Chang Jun stepped in between the two of them, separating them, and only then did Lizhu manage to free herself.
Rubbing her arm, Lizhu asked Jie Yun, “It’s already noon. Your young master is still recuperating, why wait for me to eat?”
“Young Master was worried about the Princess’s safety and could not sleep through the night.”
Lizhu thought for a moment. She really should check on Tan Xun’s injuries anyway, and it would be a good time to bring up the matter of withdrawing from the engagement. So she agreed.
Then she turned to Danzhu and said, “Good Danzhu, tell your Mountain Lord I’ll visit him later. Let him eat first, no need to wait for me.”
Jie Yun smiled and led the way ahead.
After a night of cleansing, the Pei residence no longer smelled of blood. At the entrances of each courtyard stood guards from Hongye Stronghold, while the servants were confined to their own quarters.
When Lizhu’s group arrived, the young master—upright and composed—was indeed sitting before the dining table, his eyelids half-lowered as if deep in thought.
“Princess.”
Seeing Lizhu enter the courtyard, his eyes brightened. He was about to rise, but Lizhu stepped forward to stop him.
“Didn’t you break a rib? Sit down, or you’ll make it worse. I only fell asleep at dawn and might not have woken by noon, why trouble yourself to wait for me for lunch?”
All the more so since she actually wanted to eat with Pei Zhaoye instead.
But since Jie Yun had said what he did, Lizhu couldn’t bear to disappoint him.
Seeing that Lizhu’s complexion was rosy and uninjured, Tan Xun felt a small weight lift from his heart.
He smiled faintly.
“The Princess worked hard through the night, so I didn’t prepare any greasy or hard-to-digest dishes—only some light ones, and a plate of your favorite honey rice cakes.”
Lizhu: “…”
You can’t strike a smiling man.
With him being like this, it became even harder for her to say what she wanted to.
“Tan Yuhui.”
Lizhu didn’t touch her chopsticks, raising her eyes to look at him.
“Is there anything you wish to say to me? Though I already have my own decision in mind, since you came to save me, I’m willing to hear your explanation first.”
At these words, the smile of the man sitting across the table faded slightly.
Tan Xun resembled his mother—long eyes, light brows, and an elegant air like spring willows over a pond. His skin was fair as jade, untouched by any hardship or wind and frost.
No matter what he faced, he always carried himself with calm composure and quiet poise.
“The fault lies with the Tan family. I have no excuse.”
Lizhu gazed at him quietly.
“In Wan Commandery, I was handling funeral affairs for my cousin and studying clan matters under my second uncle. The days were busy, but dull. When I heard you were coming, I was overjoyed. I spent several nights thinking about where to take you, which restaurants and taverns to visit—planned it over and over again. But instead of seeing you arrive safely, I received the news that you’d met with disaster.”
As Tan Xun spoke, his eyes dimmed.
“You sent Lu Yu to pass word to me, you counted on me. I should have set out immediately to rescue you, but I was careless and let my second uncle notice something amiss. He confined me at home, delaying the time, nearly causing a catastrophe. If it hadn’t been for that Mountain Lord of Hongye Stronghold’s rescue, I dare not imagine what might have happened.”
A breeze carried the faint scent of bergamot from him. Lizhu’s brows furrowed slightly.
Scents and memories were linked—whenever she smelled that fragrance, countless unpleasant recollections came flooding back.
“This isn’t your fault,” Lizhu said softly. “You’re a member of the Tan family. There are many things you can’t control.”
Between her and Tan Xun, this was the phrase she had said the most.
He would apologize.
And she would always say, It’s not your fault. You couldn’t help it.
But Tan Xun suddenly lifted his head.
“No. You should blame me. How can you not? His Majesty has already approved our marriage. You and I are about to become family, how could I let my family harm you—”
“And what can you do about it?”
Lizhu’s voice grew harder, colder.
There was a fire burning in her chest, Tan Xun had never seen her like this.
“Your aunt already hates me to the bone. Your second uncle will clean up after her without hesitation for the sake of the clan. Tan Xun, you are the Tan family’s legitimate eldest son, cherished since birth. Do you have any idea what it feels like to be hunted down? You want me to be your wife, to live every day in fear and trembling?”
The fingers resting on her knees clenched tightly.
Tan Xun fixed his gaze on her. “You want to dissolve the engagement?”
“The imperial decree to bestow marriage to the princess has not yet been formally issued, it was only a verbal agreement. Breaking it off doesn’t count as dissolving an official engagement.”
“…Lord Fengchang is a Tan clan protégé. Sending him a letter now to draft the decree would be no trouble at all.”
“You wouldn’t dare!”
“Princess.”
Tan Xun’s tone was still gentle, yet it carried the quiet pressure of a noble son born to privilege.
“Right now, His Majesty and the Tan family are at the height of mutual cooperation, sharing honor and prosperity. The southern noble clans have not yet fully submitted, and the eleven northern provinces stir restlessly. Our marriage is no trifling matter. I beg the Princess to think carefully.”
Lizhu’s eyes filled with moisture in an instant.
Not from grievance, but from fury.
“Hardly a trifling matter, yet was it not a trifle when your aunt tried to kill me?”
At the mention of that, Tan Xun’s breath caught slightly.
“My aunt…” he sighed, his tone helpless. “She acted willfully and without restraint. My father and second uncle were furious, but since the deed is done, aside from taking it as a warning and cleaning up after her, there’s nothing else they can do.”
Having been separated for so long, the bitterness of the past had faded somewhat, and Lizhu almost forgot—this was what he had always been like.
Always asking her to yield.
Always asking her to endure.
Everyone else could act recklessly without caring for the greater picture but she had to be the one who cared, the one who swallowed the bitter fruit others had brewed.
“Lizhu, I promise you, what happened today will never happen again.”
Looking into his sincere eyes brought her no comfort at all. Instead, the nameless fire in her heart only burned fiercer.
“You promise—!”
Just as Lizhu was about to flip the dining table in anger—
A sudden sound came from the courtyard wall.
Jie Yun shouted, “Who’s there!”
Lizhu and Tan Xun both turned toward the figure that landed lightly on the ground.
“Such a fine meal. You don’t mind adding one more person, do you?”
The man strolled in with a smile, stopped before Lizhu’s table, and casually picked up a piece of honey rice cake from the plate.
“You like this?”
He asked.
Lizhu didn’t know how long he had been listening. She froze for a moment, then gave a small nod.
“…Why are you here?”
Under Tan Xun’s unfriendly gaze, Pei Zhaoye sat naturally down beside Lizhu.
He said, “Danzhu told me someone loaded you up and carried you off. I came to see just how much he could carry.”
